Honestly, it’s one of those days where I’m sitting here at a loss of what to pour out of my heart onto my little keyboard.
I haven’t organized or decluttered anything.
I haven’t cleaned up or tidy-ed – besides the front room yesterday in order to take photos of the dining room table.
And now – the entire end of that same table already has crap on it. Again.
Same shot, 1 day later.
Yes, we have random light fixtures on our floor and boxes for an event and bean bag tosses for another event and such is our life.
I can promise that is THE ONLY ROOM IN OUR HOUSE RIGHT NOW that looks even remotely put together or clean.
Just ask my father-in-law. He came today to help us with some stuff in the house and experienced the real life Haigler home. It’s a mess.
Most of the house looks like this. Or worse. I mean, the rest of my house is so bad I don’t even dare show you photos. It’s THAT BAD!
It’s a day where I considered not sending the blog out – which you know is not normal for me at all.
Instead – I’m just here being real.
Our house is a disaster. And I feel like a fraud. And I feel like giving up.
There is so much clutter that I feel paralyzed on where to even begin. And even if I do begin the next day it’s gonna be back to a mess with these 3 littles. Why even start???
I mean, I’ve spent like 2 YEARS of my life trying to tackle this part of life. And I haven’t. I’ve failed miserably in so many ways. Yes, there have been successes, but those are hard to remember on hard days, aren’t they?
We have company coming over this weekend.
Our calendar from now to Christmas is INSANE (which happens every year with birthdays and holidays and anniversaries and company parties and church musicals and all – which I LOVE, but yeah, craziness).
When I think of all that has to be done and all that I really wish I could do instead of what HAS to be done…
Well, I just want to crawl up and go to bed early.
Does this happen to anyone else???
This is the struggle, friends.
It doesn’t help that my mind is in a wonky place tonight. I probably over-reacted with a situation this evening and I hate when I do that.
I went to a drop dead GORGEOUS perfect house earlier today (which happens all the time in my job of selling houses) and y’all, it just made me want to cry because there was no clutter. And I have SOOOO. MUCHHHH. CLUTTERRRRRR.
Thoughts jump into your head like,
“Why can’t my house be more like hers…”
“Why can’t my life be more like theirs??”
“Why can’t I just get my act together and do what I’m supposed to do?”
“Why do I want to just go to bed early when there are a thousand things to be done – laundry, dishes, closets, bathrooms, stuff, stuff, stuff?”
“Surely the Proverbs 31 lady would stay up late and get up early and just do it all for her family – that’s what the Bible says. I must not be that good.”
And right this instant I’ve chased down Brock getting into something he’s not supposed to be getting into for the thousanth time.
And then I think…
“Well, if we didn’t have all this clutter there would be nothing for him to get into.” #momfail
And my girls are arguing. Like they do almost every hour or every day.
This is the life behind the blog.
Don’t think for a hot minute that our life is anything near perfect.
Everyday is like this.
Chaos. Tears. Frustration. Hurriedness. Clutter.
But, we have love.
And we have Jesus.
And so many people would give anything to have what we have. I take that for granted so often.
What I need to do tonight is crawl into the arms of Jesus and ask for help instead of crawling to the coziness of my bed to sleep my troubles away. In times when I’m overwhelmed and I don’t know where to start – even in my own house – He is the first place to turn.
Then, take it one room, one stack at a time.
I can’t do it ALL at one time (oh, but man, I wish I could – don’t we all??).
We can do the next little thing. And then the next little thing. Suddenly – all those next little things will start adding up and we’ll make slow and steady progress.
I’m right there with you.
In those moments when you want to give up and you yell too many times at your kids and you say words like “would you just shut-up” and the minute they come flying out of your mouth you regret it – just know that I am here with you.
We all have our struggles. In our homes. In our families. In our hearts.
Start with me. Start here.
Paralyzed by your clutter and mess? Me too.
1. Start with Jesus. Ask for wisdom and guidance and for Him to shift your perspective and give you the motivation you need to change your habits and the energy to do things differently.
2. Give yourself some grace – you don’t need to be like her. You don’t have to do it like they did. Ask God to reveal the extraordinary path He’s laid out JUST FOR YOU. And walk in that. Confidently.
3. Start with the very next little thing. Pick up that bag full of purse junk (what? Am I the only one that has bags and bags full of purse junk from when you change bags or purses???). Tackle that countertop. Just the countertop. Give yourself a hand for starting there. And tomorrow, do one more next little thing. Even if the countertop gets full again. It’s worth it to keep going, I promise. Even if 2 years later you don’t see the results you want, you’ll surely see that God is leading you to a new place through this messy journey.
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